Tips For Getting Your Adolescent To Open Up

By Aurelia Williams

To many parents, their children seem like a closed book. At times it appears to be impossible to get them to open up and talk about their lives. But talking to your child and being aware of what is going on in their lives is one of the greatest ways to shield them from danger. Spying and snooping around isn’t the best way to get that information either, it will only makes matters worse if your teen finds out.

Here are a few tips to help your teen open up:

Start young. Keeping a connection going with your child is easier than starting one when you haven’t had one before. You may discover them trying to draw away once they hit a certain age; just being persistent and keeping at it can prove to work.

Be open to what they say. When you get your teen to open up, don’t be shocked if they say some things you are not fond of. Just be open to what they’re telling you instead of being critical. You can express to them that you don’t approve of something without attacking them. If they feel relaxed talking about serious things, they’ll be more likely to come to you if they have a dilemma.

Find a common ground. Look for things that you and your child are both interested in. It’s easier to talk about something that you both have in common.

Spend more together. A recent study showed that many teens complain that they are not receiving sufficient time with their parents. This is one of their top concerns. Many teens feel they can’t talk to their parents because they’re always at work or busy doing other things. Many time we fail to remember to take time out from our frantic lives to pay enough attention to our kids one on one. Some suggestions for spending additional time with your teen are:

* Set up a definite time every week to spend time with your teen
* Have dinner at the table with the whole family as often as possible
* Work out or engage in a sporting activity with your child

While your teen may be hesitant to talk to you at first, keep trying. Likely, you’ll intimately break down the wall and they’ll look forward to talking with you and spending more time with you as well.

About the Author: Need more tips on parenting your teen? Visit Parenting My Teen for free tips, resources and a bi-weekly podcast dedicated to helping you parent your adolescent.

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